tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post115378570066609629..comments2024-02-21T08:58:09.518-08:00Comments on Her Bad Mother's Basement: Co-Parenting: Myth and RealityHer Bad Motherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03535958887714152413noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-29151440744851353972009-09-25T18:35:47.425-07:002009-09-25T18:35:47.425-07:00Even though I'm not a mom yet, I can get tiny ...Even though I'm not a mom yet, I can get tiny glimmers of the last-mentioned behavior when he's *watching* me do dishes and points out how I'm doing them wrong. I'm like, "BITCH PLEASE." Lol, not really, but I usually hand him the dish and rag and walk out of the room.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1155928512062602502006-08-18T12:15:00.000-07:002006-08-18T12:15:00.000-07:00Yeah, I hear you. And that's why I'm a working mo...Yeah, I hear you. And that's why I'm a working mommy. I'm not strong enough to be a stay at home mommy.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1154435074596416882006-08-01T05:24:00.000-07:002006-08-01T05:24:00.000-07:00I am into my second marriage. First husband was on...I am into my second marriage. First husband was only available to hang out with the kids (3 of them) when company was around. Other than that he spent alot of time watching tv, yelling at the kids, fishing with his buddies, etc. The new husband is wonderful but he still wants to "unwind" when he gets home. He does take little guy-10 months old(yes, that makes 4 kids, 3 are teenagers now) when he Chrissyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01422346735618656916noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1154094437615674912006-07-28T06:47:00.000-07:002006-07-28T06:47:00.000-07:00I so hear you. I couldn't handle being a SAHM. It ...I so hear you. I couldn't handle being a SAHM. It almost killed me. I went back to work - not saying you should. It's just what I could do. For awhile we switched roles and my husband stayed home. Within 2 weeks we had found daycare and shortly thereafter my husband went back to a new job.<BR/>No matter what it's hard. At least you are not at home.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153934918187795262006-07-26T10:28:00.000-07:002006-07-26T10:28:00.000-07:00It doesn't have to be this way. Instead of biting ...It doesn't have to be this way. Instead of biting your tongue, SAY SOMETHING. If you're not telling him you're unhappy with the way things are, you're not giving him a chance to change anything!<BR/><BR/>Now, if after you tell him how you're feeling and that you expect a change and he STILL doesn't co-parent, then you have every right to kick his ass.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153886595872365422006-07-25T21:03:00.000-07:002006-07-25T21:03:00.000-07:00I'm sorry that this is how it is for you and so ma...I'm sorry that this is how it is for you and so many women. It does not have to be that way.nonlineargirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05414675024101618604noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153880777796424642006-07-25T19:26:00.000-07:002006-07-25T19:26:00.000-07:00comforting but also sad to see so many of us strug...comforting but also sad to see so many of us struggle with this. <BR/><BR/>I say lay it on the line as a few others have said<BR/>you cannot continue like this. that being "sharp" for work business is crap.<BR/>when I went back to work it was like a vacation. staying at home is the hardest job ever.<BR/>I do have to keep explaining to my husband that this is his other job. slacking on the laundrymoplanshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16998309937928231527noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153856983356634502006-07-25T12:49:00.000-07:002006-07-25T12:49:00.000-07:00He needs to come home and relax? That's such bull...He needs to come home and relax? That's such bullshit! What has he been doing all day in comparison to what you've been doing. I'm a working mom but remember being on maternity leave and coming to "work" is 500 times easier than being at home! Tell him you'll go to work and he can be a SAHD and see what he says. He wouldn't last two days. Then maybe he would appreciate what you do and Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153856446909898722006-07-25T12:40:00.000-07:002006-07-25T12:40:00.000-07:00Sadly, I see this a lot: husband has set working h...Sadly, I see this a lot: husband has set working hours and weekends off (if one more man calls it 'babysitting' when they're his own kids.... grrrrrr!), and wife/mother works 24/7. Total crap! Perhaps presenting him with a breakdown of what it would cost him to support two households should you kick his selfish butt to the curb would help...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153855149852521962006-07-25T12:19:00.000-07:002006-07-25T12:19:00.000-07:00I work outside the home, and I feel this way too. ...I work outside the home, and I feel this way too. There will always be a power struggle over whose job is more important (job defined to include all WOH, WAH, SAH etc).<BR/><BR/>I work all day and am still the one expected to do all the cleaning, cooking and child-rearing. I even make more money. But somehow, he gets a full night's sleep, gets to 'decompress' after work, and gets nights out.<Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153851024536432682006-07-25T11:10:00.000-07:002006-07-25T11:10:00.000-07:00OMG, thank you thank you thank you. This is it EXA...OMG, thank you thank you thank you. This is it EXACTLY. It's worse for me because my husband works at home and thus, ALL THE TIME and gets annoyed when I ask for his help whether it's 6pm or 10pm. :(Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153841400263887152006-07-25T08:30:00.000-07:002006-07-25T08:30:00.000-07:00Are you married to my husband?Lots of hugs to you....Are you married to my husband?<BR/>Lots of hugs to you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153839276759335412006-07-25T07:54:00.000-07:002006-07-25T07:54:00.000-07:00Right on. WOW.Right on. WOW.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153831166229856422006-07-25T05:39:00.000-07:002006-07-25T05:39:00.000-07:00I think being a working mom, although sucks in som...I think being a working mom, although sucks in some way, is better on your marraige. Cause even a man can see....ok we both work the same hours, so when we come home....it's 50/50! <BR/><BR/>I hope to be able to stay home when I have #2.....I hope this isn't going to be how it ends up.<BR/><BR/>Doesn't sound fun at all...<BR/>*hugs*Jennhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17498882698871973763noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153803957076360522006-07-24T22:05:00.000-07:002006-07-24T22:05:00.000-07:00It is hard. My husband does his best but he reall...It is hard. My husband does his best but he really can't get it because he is not here by my side facing what I am facing. I hope that you can get your husband to give you more help.Awesome Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03523320907836876707noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153795635638343072006-07-24T19:47:00.000-07:002006-07-24T19:47:00.000-07:00Yeah, that's pretty much how it is a lot of the ti...Yeah, that's pretty much how it is a lot of the time, for a lot of people. <BR/><BR/>It was like that for me until my son was around 10 months old and I just couldn't take it anymore and started telling my husband the truth about how I felt all the time, and how exhausted I was all the time-- not telling him just once or twice a month, but constantly.<BR/><BR/>I think the day I said, "You know, Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153789200653130622006-07-24T18:00:00.000-07:002006-07-24T18:00:00.000-07:00I could have written your post. You are not alone...I could have written your post. You are not alone. Big hugs, and try to take some time for yourself, somehow.chichimamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17549929656881693553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153789032562936172006-07-24T17:57:00.000-07:002006-07-24T17:57:00.000-07:00It's not fair and it's not right, but I know that'...It's not fair and it's not right, but I know that's how it is for most women. And I'm sorry.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1153785886426641712006-07-24T17:04:00.000-07:002006-07-24T17:04:00.000-07:00I couldn't say it better.I couldn't say it better.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com