tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post116429010434521713..comments2024-02-21T08:58:09.518-08:00Comments on Her Bad Mother's Basement: Hope and FearHer Bad Motherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03535958887714152413noreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1166057304750792152006-12-13T16:48:00.000-08:002006-12-13T16:48:00.000-08:00A week after your post, I also lost my baby. I sh...A week after your post, I also lost my baby. I should have been at 12 weeks, but I'd had a missed spontaneous abortion at 8. I had to go in for a D&C, and ended up spending the night prior to surgery, miserable and bleeding, in the ER.<BR/><BR/>My husband and I were devastated. We still are. This was going to be our first baby. Time and work, faith, lots of love, and excellent coping Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1165352744001304752006-12-05T13:05:00.000-08:002006-12-05T13:05:00.000-08:00I could have written half of these comments. I als...I could have written half of these comments. I also had a miscarriage. I also went through the self blame and I was sure it was my only chance. <BR/><BR/>The next time I got pregnant I had twins.<BR/><BR/>The pain never completely goes away, but it gets easier.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1165257307415252222006-12-04T10:35:00.000-08:002006-12-04T10:35:00.000-08:00You are only 32 years old. This is the beginning o...You are only 32 years old. <BR/><BR/>This is the beginning of trying.<BR/><BR/>You will have your operation, and in 6 months or a year be pregnant againa and give birth to a little angel.<BR/><BR/>Please hang in there.The City Galhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09819377234772187931noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1165062266519916312006-12-02T04:24:00.000-08:002006-12-02T04:24:00.000-08:00I'm sorry.I've had 4 miscarriages, and it doesn't ...I'm sorry.<BR/>I've had 4 miscarriages, and it doesn't get any easier. I have a 2 year old son... so I know my body knows how.<BR/><BR/>There is nothing you did to make it happen. I believve (I have to) that a m/c is the body's way of eliminating a mis-formed set of cells.<BR/><BR/>You can have a baby-- I had my son after 2 m/c's... and we are trying for another as well...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164991451909718122006-12-01T08:44:00.000-08:002006-12-01T08:44:00.000-08:00Oh, honey, I am so sorry. I wish I could gie you a...Oh, honey, I am so sorry. I wish I could gie you a big hug. It's an awful thing, and I am surprised at how many women have miscarriages, when they start talking about it and one after another, say, "Yeah, me too." <BR/><BR/>I think a lot of women worry as you do about whether it was something they did, because it seems like we're supposed to do this easily, naturally, like this is what our bodieskittenpiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05215443551546036909noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164641787872151342006-11-27T07:36:00.000-08:002006-11-27T07:36:00.000-08:00My best friend went through a miscarriage over a y...My best friend went through a miscarriage over a year ago. It was a very difficult time and she wondered the same thing - why no one thought it was a big deal. Thank you for sharing - it is a big deal. Wishing you much hope and blessings in the futurebraiding mommyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04845891446407661946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164588718968365132006-11-26T16:51:00.000-08:002006-11-26T16:51:00.000-08:00My mom got pregnant with my little brother when he...My mom got pregnant with my little brother when her marriage was crumbling. She tried every old wives tale she had ever heard hoping to lose the pregnancy. No luck. She adored her baby boy when he came. Please don't plague yourself with what you could have done wrong to cause this. Clearly something went wrong, but it was not your fault and not something you did. Hold yourself dear for yourAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164587972780262852006-11-26T16:39:00.000-08:002006-11-26T16:39:00.000-08:00I'm so sorry to hear this. It's heartwrenching, i...I'm so sorry to hear this. It's heartwrenching, isn't it? I lost my second at almost 11 weeks and went through the same self-doubt that you seem to be going through -- was it the wine I drank before I knew? The coffee? What had I done? Or not done that robbed me of my baby? But you know it wasn't anything you did or didn't do, right? <BR/><BR/>Trust me, this wasn't your only chance.<BR/><BRalisonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16483907412532940799noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164557032377860002006-11-26T08:03:00.000-08:002006-11-26T08:03:00.000-08:00We miscarried once. We didn't try for nearly six ...We miscarried once. We didn't try for nearly six years meaning we didn't use much protection for nearly six years. And then, after a night in the hot tub, it just happened. <BR/><BR/>I know, I know. You hate hearing those "it happens its own time" stories. I did, too. But I am one of those stories, now. So have some faith. And practice, practice, practice.Jenihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03509879813753756682noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164466157005785202006-11-25T06:49:00.000-08:002006-11-25T06:49:00.000-08:00There's always hope for you. And it does get bett...There's always hope for you. And it does get better, even when the anniversaries loom large and it gets worse all over again.<BR/><BR/>I've had two losses and two perfect children. I'm grateful for my children every single day, but I often think of those lost chances, too. Not every day, anymore - it does fade in the face of normal everyday chaos - but it's there. <BR/><BR/>It felt like no Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02778318185310548615noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164394099373238852006-11-24T10:48:00.000-08:002006-11-24T10:48:00.000-08:00I'm so sorry for your loss.I'm so sorry for your loss.Sonia Wetzel Photographyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05075315979465608558noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164392791087127892006-11-24T10:26:00.000-08:002006-11-24T10:26:00.000-08:00Thank you for sharing. I had a miscarriage and I ...Thank you for sharing. I had a miscarriage and I still feel a void or a sadness in my heart, I lost one of my babies. You didn't do anything wrong. I'm sorry for you, for me, and for the other women (and men too) who have to experience this and live with this. I am lucky enough to have two beautiful children now and I am grateful they are both healthy children. I wish you well.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164375267439578692006-11-24T05:34:00.000-08:002006-11-24T05:34:00.000-08:00I'm so very sorry for your loss. I won't say I kn...I'm so very sorry for your loss. <BR/><BR/>I won't say I know how you feel, because I don't. But I do know there's nothing you did or didn't do that 'caused' the miscarriage. Really. <BR/><BR/>I hope your surgery is a success and you go on to create the family of which you dream.ewe are herehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13339650361453626546noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164335874768590032006-11-23T18:37:00.000-08:002006-11-23T18:37:00.000-08:00Me too sister, me too, it's a sad club but there a...Me too sister, me too, it's a sad club but there are many members. I now have a 2 year old son, there is hope for you, I wiash you well.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164326229708586212006-11-23T15:57:00.000-08:002006-11-23T15:57:00.000-08:00Grieve with your husband sister, but don't blame y...Grieve with your husband sister, but don't blame your body or yourself...it just happened. I had an unplanned pregnancy miscarriage...but I believe that souls choose us as parents, so I knew that the soul who left my body would be back again...and until then was with me in spirit. It made me feel so much better...<BR/><BR/>Peace of heart to you and your husband,<BR/>LilLilhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01790648053581236364noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164306877396132872006-11-23T10:34:00.000-08:002006-11-23T10:34:00.000-08:00I'm so sorry for your loss. It was not your fault...I'm so sorry for your loss. It was not your fault. <BR/><BR/>I know there is hope for you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164303073459478402006-11-23T09:31:00.000-08:002006-11-23T09:31:00.000-08:00I don't know why no one talks about miscarriages, ...I don't know why no one talks about miscarriages, either. Unfortunately for us, we have now had three early pregnacy losses and each subsequent time, our family and friends offer less and less support. It's hard to make the decision to share something so personal about yourself as you never know what drivel might come out of someone's mouth. <BR/><BR/>It's true that you did nothing to cause your DDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17864339996118337420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164300654037642122006-11-23T08:50:00.000-08:002006-11-23T08:50:00.000-08:00There's so much hope for you. I don't know who you...There's so much hope for you. I don't know who you are or if you pray - and I don't pray that often - but I'll say one for you. There's hope. Where there's love, there's always hope.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164298223065047012006-11-23T08:10:00.000-08:002006-11-23T08:10:00.000-08:00I wish more people would talk about miscarriages t...I wish more people would talk about miscarriages too. I don't think many of us understand how devastating it is. Thank you for being so open about what happened to you.<BR/><BR/>I have a dear friend who's gone through hell to become pregnant - including surgery WHILE pregnant to remove a grapefruit-sized cyst - and she's just gone past 20 weeks now. Hers is the miracle story I will trot out toAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164295343766345882006-11-23T07:22:00.000-08:002006-11-23T07:22:00.000-08:00I had a miscarriage too. And I still wonder about...I had a miscarriage too. And I still wonder about the baby, who he or she would have been.<BR/><BR/>But I had other children, and I carried on to have another. I was blessed.<BR/><BR/>But I will never forget that plopping sound, or the acute emptiness that followed. <BR/><BR/>I hope all is well with you, and you have the opportunity to have your own child. May God bless you and heal your bodyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164294240692285412006-11-23T07:04:00.000-08:002006-11-23T07:04:00.000-08:00There wasn't anything you could have done- it's so...There wasn't anything you could have done- it's sooo not your fault. Studies have been done that say between 30 and 75 percent of pregnancies end in miscarraige. (It's a wide window because it's a hard study to do, most people agree it's closer to 30 percent than 75) Other studies have been done that found genetic problems in most of the babies that were lost in miscarraiges. Miss your baby, Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1164292830884203872006-11-23T06:40:00.000-08:002006-11-23T06:40:00.000-08:00I had a miscarriage years ago, an unplanned pregna...I had a miscarriage years ago, an unplanned pregnancy. I was just getting used to the idea of having a baby when it happened. I spent the next 10 years wondering if that was my only chance. When I did get pregnant again I spent the entire time worrying about losing the baby. But I didn't. I know it's not the same but I wanted you to know I sort of understand though these emotions are your Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com