tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post1294497165977323464..comments2024-02-21T08:58:09.518-08:00Comments on Her Bad Mother's Basement: FatHer Bad Motherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03535958887714152413noreply@blogger.comBlogger33125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-37557793772487387422009-03-11T22:49:00.000-07:002009-03-11T22:49:00.000-07:00http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&...http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=320347831183Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-87141536766823219502008-11-02T14:59:00.000-08:002008-11-02T14:59:00.000-08:00This is such an amazing post! I am so pleased your...This is such an amazing post! I am so pleased your wrote this. I just had my daughter and I fear she has my metabolism. I have just joined a gym at WW so that I can lost the 30kg I need to because I want to role model to her that you can eat healthy and be healthy but I also want to make sure I don't pass on my battle to her. This post has been amazingly helpful to me. I am so so sorry you have Louisa Clairehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01504106677453816810noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-46287608571518859472008-10-25T18:33:00.000-07:002008-10-25T18:33:00.000-07:00My parents divorced when I was 12. We saw my dad o...My parents divorced when I was 12. We saw my dad once a week. Almost everytime we went to his place he would comment on the size of our bums. The message was clear, people with perfect bodies are better than people who don't have perfect bodies. This is so dangerous. These seemingly innocent, small comments have deep routed, far reaching affects that last a life time if you don't get help with itAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-15996642682658360992008-10-18T08:18:00.000-07:002008-10-18T08:18:00.000-07:00A friend of mine nearly killed herself with anorex...A friend of mine nearly killed herself with anorexia when around 17, was ill for much longer, and finally turned into a healthily eating vegan. She had a baby last year, at 34, and did not put on an inch.<BR/>I am an averyage eater with an interest in healthy eating who exercises. I lost every pound I put on 4-5 months after I'd had my girl.<BR/>What I'm saying is, you have a big say in what Alexandrahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07995623923136302080noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1332091278149562602008-10-16T08:44:00.000-07:002008-10-16T08:44:00.000-07:00"Don't you also care how boys, who will grow up to..."Don't you also care how boys, who will grow up to be men, view women's bodies? ...Please do their future girlfriends/wives a favor and try to raise men who are accepting of a real woman's shape, not some false ideal. "<BR/><BR/>I LOVE this comment...it is so true! I've always struggled with my weight and what I "should" weigh (thank you Air Force) and my first baby is almost 6 mos old. I've Honighttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14901300803002980740noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-59037067434028258092008-10-16T08:40:00.000-07:002008-10-16T08:40:00.000-07:00I read your post and wept. Thank you for having th...I read your post and wept. Thank you for having the courage to share your story.<BR/><BR/>I've been throwing up several times a day since I was 16. I'm 42 now. I worry about what I'll do when my knees won't let me kneel in front of the toilet anymore. How obscene is that?<BR/><BR/>We tell our daughters/nieces/sisters/friends to love themselves, to acknowledge their brains and beauty...yet theyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-43120807268763977812008-10-15T19:45:00.000-07:002008-10-15T19:45:00.000-07:00I'm amazed by your courage in writing and posting ...I'm amazed by your courage in writing and posting this. I don't know if I could have done it.<BR/><BR/>Thank you for sharing such a private piece of yourself with us. It is truly an important thing for all mothers -- no, all women -- to read.<BR/><BR/>I have two daughters and a weight problem. I certainly needed to read this. Thank you so much for telling your story.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-28946251855915495232008-10-15T15:35:00.000-07:002008-10-15T15:35:00.000-07:00Gosh, I know how you feel. I struggle with my wei...Gosh, I know how you feel. I struggle with my weight constantly but I try to remind myself that that's not what it's all about. Sure, I'm chunky. But I'm loving, and caring, and fun too. <BR/><BR/>Hang in there. I think it will forever be a struggle for most of us but it's something worth struggling against rather than letting it take over our lives.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-29309942661928243982008-10-15T12:59:00.000-07:002008-10-15T12:59:00.000-07:00For those who say 'maybe you'll have boys': Don't ...For those who say 'maybe you'll have boys': Don't you also care how boys, who will grow up to be men, view women's bodies? You have a lot do to with that too. Please do their future girlfriends/wives a favor and try to raise men who are accepting of a real woman's shape, not some false ideal. Plus men care about things like height and weight and being handsome too.<BR/><BR/>And my mom has Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-64574038811116334872008-10-15T12:50:00.000-07:002008-10-15T12:50:00.000-07:00I wouldn't NOT have kids because of this. You migh...I wouldn't NOT have kids because of this. You might have boys, after all. And if they're girls, well, just be vigilant about not saying you look fat and teach them to love their bodies for what they are.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-5721049130383591922008-10-15T09:31:00.000-07:002008-10-15T09:31:00.000-07:00This was an incredibly beautiful post. Thank you....This was an incredibly beautiful post. Thank you.Jenny Gracehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12943823729806115657noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-86058496458937814992008-10-15T09:26:00.000-07:002008-10-15T09:26:00.000-07:00My eating disorder started when I was 6 and didn't...My eating disorder started when I was 6 and didn't end until I was 17. During my recovery, I gained a lot of weight, mostly because my metabolism was totally shot and my body was used to hanging on to any food it could get. I was feeling low about it one day and asked my mother (who had constantly remarked on my beauty while I was rail thin) "Do you think I'm fat, Mom?" She said, without heelshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18289101709267258057noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-55992831148250536952008-10-15T07:27:00.000-07:002008-10-15T07:27:00.000-07:00Please be careful everyone because you seem to foc...Please be careful everyone because you seem to focus on just the daughters. This effects boys, too. They can fall victim to the stereotypes of weight just as easily as women. Never call your children fat, no matter whether they are girls or boys because no one should ever be made to think they are fat. We are all beautiful in our own ways and no two people are exactly alike, even identical twins.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-84856507949708524572008-10-15T07:15:00.000-07:002008-10-15T07:15:00.000-07:00Oh I'm so sorry for your pain. But you sound real...Oh I'm so sorry for your pain. But you sound really good!! You are to be commended for overcoming this - it's tough. And have some babies honey!! Your awareness will make all the difference. If you ever should slip up, you'll know and you'll talk to her and it will be fine. (And maybe you'll have boys anyway!)Amyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14258405168792203613noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-45342873886875665172008-10-15T06:13:00.000-07:002008-10-15T06:13:00.000-07:00Thanks for this. Really.I'm the overweight one in...Thanks for this. Really.<BR/><BR/>I'm the overweight one in my family. My mother is tiny and I'm not ... not by a long shot. <BR/><BR/>I had a baby eight weeks too early last year, and she's still at the very bottom of the growth chart. The pediatrician wants her to gain weight, and my mother is horrified by that. She told me, "it's better for her to be at the bottom of the scale than the topAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-61981993879258586422008-10-15T05:11:00.000-07:002008-10-15T05:11:00.000-07:00I so understand this. I don't have an eating disor...I so understand this. I don't have an eating disorder per se, but I hate my body - and always have.<BR/>Like you, I can remember my thin, beautiful mom telling me she was fat, and as I grew up being accepted or rejected based on my weight.<BR/>But.<BR/>I have 2 beautiful children.<BR/>And I try my best to accept myself and like myself no matter my weight.<BR/>My son is 4 now. And he has no Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-71793438687844234222008-10-15T04:45:00.000-07:002008-10-15T04:45:00.000-07:00The fact that you've recognized where it started, ...The fact that you've recognized where it started, and that it's a problem, and the fact that you want to change it. That will be enough. Enough to get married and enough to have babies (if those are what you want) and enough to raise your children with healthy self-images. You will take the same self-determination you used to hurt yourself and use it to build up your family instead.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-5342269100326578432008-10-15T02:04:00.000-07:002008-10-15T02:04:00.000-07:00It took tremendous courage to write this. Then to...It took tremendous courage to write this. Then to post it.<BR/><BR/>Now? You are changing the lives of the children who are already born, through the mothers who are reading.<BR/><BR/>The internet sometimes baffles me in its power.JChevaishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02683339168047479228noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-66916270692466474112008-10-14T21:22:00.000-07:002008-10-14T21:22:00.000-07:00Well done for taking care of yourself; your spirit...Well done for taking care of yourself; your spirit and body both.<BR/><BR/>I too am recovering. I have a daughter.<BR/><BR/>She is 4.5 yrs old.<BR/><BR/>The thought terrifies me of how I will bring her up to be an assured woman and not succumb like me to fears or ridiculous expectations. I hope I can.<BR/><BR/>Again, congratulations on the success you've had thus farAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-14826272941099342522008-10-14T20:48:00.000-07:002008-10-14T20:48:00.000-07:00This is just plain excellent. And good for you fo...This is just plain excellent. And good for you for fighting out of the weight issue thing.<BR/>My husband is the weight nut in our family. He judges people's worth by their weight. Sometimes I wish I could duct tape his mouth.<BR/>And, of course, he is one of those pain in the ass people who can eat and eat and not gain. But he obsesses about calories and what is 'good for him' at every meal.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-82179650014225103082008-10-14T19:43:00.000-07:002008-10-14T19:43:00.000-07:00That was an amazing post! You are a wonderful per...That was an amazing post! You are a wonderful person because you recognize the problem and are correcting it :) I think you would be a good mother, because you know what not to do. I went though similar things because I was physically and mentally abused by my mother. I was 30 when I had my first child. I hope in time you will feel better about it too!<BR/>Many hugs!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-36729134087366056132008-10-14T12:30:00.000-07:002008-10-14T12:30:00.000-07:00"I refuse to let this carry on into another genera..."I refuse to let this carry on into another generation of beautiful, talented, smart, loved and worthwhile women. But I don’t know how to go about changing. Yet."<BR/><BR/>you already are changing it by recognizing it and talking about it. by seeing your own beauty and talent and also that of the next generation as well. <BR/><BR/>thank you !Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-48221799563489960742008-10-14T11:54:00.000-07:002008-10-14T11:54:00.000-07:00I have a daughter who is 7. I have never said in ...I have a daughter who is 7. I have never said in front of her that I feel fat, or look fat, or anything. I think these thoughts. Often. And I know I shouldn't. I KNOW I am thin, too thin some say, but I look fat to me when I see my reflection. I thought that by not saying these things in front of her that she would be saved somehow. She hasn't though. She constantly tells me that she is Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-19570531458806951902008-10-14T11:20:00.000-07:002008-10-14T11:20:00.000-07:00Your post is so timely.I never realized how tied w...Your post is so timely.<BR/><BR/>I never realized how tied with my weight my overall self image was until after I had my second child. I had always been thin, and with my first child (10 years earlier) the weight just fell off and no one could tell I just had a baby. With my second, I had gained a total of 95 lbs, and being "fat" just devastated me. I couldn't stop talking about how big I was,Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-72844931818718390302008-10-14T04:59:00.000-07:002008-10-14T04:59:00.000-07:00I don't have an eating disorder, just the usual bo...I don't have an eating disorder, just the usual body issues, but even that comes with a ridiculous burden of time spent planning calories and exercise, feeling ugly and being derailed from my bigger projects by the desperate need to get my body perfect first.<BR/><BR/>What a waste it is, when my body won't be perfect no matter what I do.<BR/><BR/>My mother, to this day, comments on my weight Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com