tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post4385189709651212136..comments2024-02-21T08:58:09.518-08:00Comments on Her Bad Mother's Basement: Waiting On My Thirty Pieces Of SilverHer Bad Motherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03535958887714152413noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-9498120530269149932010-04-10T20:39:24.147-07:002010-04-10T20:39:24.147-07:00I'm so sorry. My MIL had dementia when I was h...I'm so sorry. My MIL had dementia when I was her only living family member, when we were both grieving the loss of her son, and it was like hell. I hated being a caregiver to her. It's a cruel disease in some ways.<br /><br />I wonder if knowing that you are permitted to grieve -- to feel all the full depressing shit of it -- would help you process this little hell.<br /><br />I'm so Supa Dupa Freshhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07659738264922395349noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-42009926359611203722010-02-18T15:27:14.249-08:002010-02-18T15:27:14.249-08:00Beautifully written. And I'm sorry for all th...Beautifully written. And I'm sorry for all that life has handed you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-38118663995517531822010-02-16T07:29:58.325-08:002010-02-16T07:29:58.325-08:00You did not betray her. Her body and her mind hav...You did not betray her. Her body and her mind have betrayed her. All you have done is describe symptoms so that she can get the best medical help available. Ignoring it won't make it go away, and I suspect your father is in denial. This is a safety issue --for herself and others around her. Please don't feel like you are a Judas for doing what you had to do. As the mom of a special Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-61566307117850257832010-02-16T05:08:22.589-08:002010-02-16T05:08:22.589-08:00I am so sorry. The woman your mother was is still...I am so sorry. The woman your mother was is still (and will always be) alive in the parts of you that are shaped by her, those ways of mothering you have that you know, irrevocably, are from her... I'm so sorry she isn't there to see it. And that you have to watch this happen.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-30457278167769861212010-02-15T18:30:46.933-08:002010-02-15T18:30:46.933-08:00My mother went into dementia fairly slowly. Somet...My mother went into dementia fairly slowly. Sometimes, she was back in time; other times she would make nasty comments to me while we were around other people. I could still love her when she went back in time. It was hard to love her when she was nasty. She's gone now, but to be honest, she died long before her body ever did. At her funeral, she was a stranger; my "mom" had Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-982165847594843162010-02-15T18:30:32.052-08:002010-02-15T18:30:32.052-08:00God, I'm sorry. My dad was diagnosed with term...God, I'm sorry. My dad was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer this weekend. He won't let me or any of my siblings see him right now--he's too emotional and I think he's afraid of what he's becoming. I don't know what's harder: that, or the fact that he knows exactly what's happening.<br /><br />Either way, it's awful. It's just motherfucking awful.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-46769785790991822282010-02-15T10:42:41.884-08:002010-02-15T10:42:41.884-08:00I am so sorry. Sorry that you have to live through...I am so sorry. Sorry that you have to live through this, sorry that your kids will never know the wonderful woman that was your mother. You have done the right thing. It may not feel like it right now but you did.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-55231757838188460092010-02-15T10:36:21.221-08:002010-02-15T10:36:21.221-08:00I'm not sure what to say but I want to comment...I'm not sure what to say but I want to comment since I read this. I just can't even imagine. I'm so sorry :(MommyLovesStilettoshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09743876173745605269noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-63191856471590723082010-02-15T09:32:51.825-08:002010-02-15T09:32:51.825-08:00Wow. I don't know what to say. Raw... that'...Wow. I don't know what to say. Raw... that's how it looks, how it seems that you feel, how you revealed your feelings. It's hard to see our moms fading fast when they were once so strong, so encouraging, so young, so invigorating, so............. But they're not anymore. <br /><br />Wow. Your description ("Waiting on My Thirty Pieces of Silver) and your mapquest wonder of Sharonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12005695519129502934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-65897453658731695062010-02-15T08:56:41.592-08:002010-02-15T08:56:41.592-08:00I'm so sorry. I'm trying to cope on my own...I'm so sorry. I'm trying to cope on my own dealing with my mother, who is often at varying levels of "out of it", they don't know why. And it's awful. I've been ratting her out to her doctors for awhile. It's awful. I'm so sorry - reconciling was and is *sucks*. You did the right thing and you aren't alone. Hugs.Ceejhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06868963133007816800noreply@blogger.com