tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post898998950359795380..comments2008-03-24T20:17:07.083-07:00Her Bad Motherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03535958887714152413noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-59459605514384367212008-03-24T20:17:00.000-07:002008-03-24T20:17:00.000-07:00

Oh, I am so, so sorry. I grew up as the child in this scenario. It wasn't easy, but we all made it, and hey, my brother grew up and paid off my mother's crushing debts. Don't give your child up. Don't give up. Do see a credit counselor/debt consolidation program. For birthdays, if you want Henry to go (and maybe you don't want him witnessing an orgy of consumerism ), send along a handmade

Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-74946287127327894152008-03-12T19:58:00.000-07:002008-03-12T19:58:00.000-07:00

Money is the root of all evil, and it's the cause of many migraines, and guess what? It'll come and go, but your family, it's forever.70G is alot, it sounds like alot, the weight of that kind of debt is immense, but it is temporary if your proactive about the outcome. Adoption? It's forever, whatever you decide to do, think about that. The debt can go away with a few changes, perhaps even a debt

MamaMichelsBabieshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15233906192952776105noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-65767568546100699422008-03-10T11:05:00.000-07:002008-03-10T11:05:00.000-07:00

kate, just curious as to why you would you actively try to conceive a third child when you're so in debt?

Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-1980352819792310402008-03-08T11:40:00.000-08:002008-03-08T11:40:00.000-08:00

carolie, you are a success story! Thank you for sharing your experience. Being able to ask for, and getting the correct help, can turn this thing around. There is light at the end of the tunnel.Do it for yourself, do it for you kids.

Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-79077477779605813622008-03-07T11:49:00.000-08:002008-03-07T11:49:00.000-08:00

My best friend and I owned a restaurant...and it went under. My first husband left me (and left me with all our joint debts when he left the country!) My friend chose bankruptcy, but I was afraid to do that.Going to a credit counselor saved my credit rating, and honestly, I think it saved my life. I was ready to toss in the towel. I was working three jobs, and felt like I was running as fast

Caroliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11637418089860927715noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-71390087922757864172008-03-06T00:14:00.000-08:002008-03-06T00:14:00.000-08:00

I am so sorry. It is so hard. A few years ago my husband and I were in a similar situation when I was pregnant with our first child and he was unemployed. It was scary and the only way I got through it was deep breaths and taking things one step at a time. If you think of everything all together it seems overwhelming. What gets me though is to remember that our children are only young once and

Jenniferhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00930427420786164103noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-41845535205434808922008-03-05T14:15:00.000-08:002008-03-05T14:15:00.000-08:00

I was you last year - only we were $125,000 in debt.I live in Canada, so I don't know if it's the same for the US, but do you guys have consumer proposals? They asses your debts and your assets and then they determine a budget that's affordable. For example, we will have to make a payment of $400 a month for 4 years to pay off our proposal. In this way, the creditors get something instead of

Dawnnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-34054176453594966802008-03-04T18:14:00.000-08:002008-03-04T18:14:00.000-08:00

i truly feel terrible for your situation. when your husband left the bd of ed, did he get approved for a leave of absence to keep his options open with the city? i know its not ideal to return to the city...when all the money is in long island, but at least then there would be a salary, better health benefits and lower commuting costs. also another not so ideal option would be for you to get a

Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-18766106386111328382008-03-04T15:30:00.000-08:002008-03-04T15:30:00.000-08:00

I want to echo dkaz's point that you might have to make some tough short-term decisions. Just because your husband might have to take a second job--or you have to take a part-time one--doesn't mean you'll be stuck in those jobs forever. Just because you might need to downsize your house or your lifestyle for a few months (or years) doesn't mean it's permanent. Don't beat yourself up over this and

Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-29137024750555503282008-03-04T12:15:00.000-08:002008-03-04T12:15:00.000-08:00

Have you ever tried listening to Dave Ramsey? He has a free radio show and you can find his web site at www.daveramsey.com He has good advice and thousands of callers in your same situation. He IS a little bit on the Christian side but I just tune that part out so, if that's not your thing do turn him off right away--his advice is totally secular.

Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-11473375395139847322008-03-04T10:08:00.000-08:002008-03-04T10:08:00.000-08:00

Being in debt is so stressful and makes you feel so bad about everything. I know its hard (practically impossible for me) but you have to try and think about money unemotionally. See a debt counselor - check around for a good one and check references. Don't wait! Things will not get better by waiting - they will continue to compound. There are resources available; make a decision to get out

dkazhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13072562667461596506noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-83907432515368316992008-03-04T06:37:00.000-08:002008-03-04T06:37:00.000-08:00

you need to see a credit counsellor ASAP. this will help. they will work with your creditors for a lower interest rate and reasonable payment plan so that you can survive better.i am nor sure where located but in toronto:http://www.hrpao.org/conf2006/Exhibitors/exhibitorcluster/Credit+Counselling+Service+of+Toronto.htmi know many people who have done this and it worked out great. were out of debt

Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-6064115565988543432008-03-04T05:31:00.000-08:002008-03-04T05:31:00.000-08:00

I will echo exactly what the above poster said. I was a single mother for my daughter's entire life. I never received a dime of child support. I struggled financially for all of her younger years. We made it by, but barely. as she approached high school, it became clear that she needed much more educationally than our school system could provide her. I opted to send her to an expensive private

Avalonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12717171111059212946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-87517656247273367962008-03-04T05:11:00.000-08:002008-03-04T05:11:00.000-08:00

A year and a half ago my partner and I bought our first home - a modest 932 square foot house. He had been promised a promotion and raise that would make it work financially, but he works for a non-profit, and the raise was delayed. Within two months I was sure they were going to take our house. We were getting calls from creditors and I was so stressed out that I couldn't make it through a day

nellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02006026922416983261noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-41434138942264731092008-03-03T23:08:00.000-08:002008-03-03T23:08:00.000-08:00

Hi, I'm a stay at home mom. We have five children between the ages of 8 & 15. Our annual yearly income is $32,000. And we have only made that respectively within the last 2 years. Before then we were doing good to have made $24,000. My husband is the sole income maker. We also homeschool. We have atleast $20grand in medical debt alone. Mainly because the government claims that we make to much for

Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-88279493294202981452008-03-03T19:18:00.000-08:002008-03-03T19:18:00.000-08:00

I wish I had advice to give, but all I can do is say I understand. It is insane that the average middle class family can't make ends meet anymore. My husband took on a part-time job in addition to his full time job, and then got upset that we still had trouble meeting bills each month. I explained that with food, energy and gas bills all going up, we've lost any gain.We're struggling too, and I

Christinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07345875955750219033noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-59422627998647573642008-03-03T16:48:00.000-08:002008-03-03T16:48:00.000-08:00

Ewe Are Here said all the same thing I wanted to say, she is great like that. I totally agree that there is something wrong with a society that allows this to happen (perhaps proof of a disappearing middle class?). I'm sorry that I don't have suggestions to offer, I can only offer support.

motherbumperhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16053978199395919666noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-80121815283890874802008-03-03T15:31:00.000-08:002008-03-03T15:31:00.000-08:00

I wish I knew the answer. I happen to have married into a family with money, and we recently received an inheritance.And you know, I would so, so rather that my husband had a few more years to figure out some workable relationship with his father and still be $80K in debt. But that's neither here nor there.The irony is, despite the inheritance, we'll - *I'll* - still be deeply in debt, because

Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02778318185310548615noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26063103.post-79159099753754663402008-03-03T14:50:00.000-08:002008-03-03T14:50:00.000-08:00

No one is going to flame you in the comments here, because there is nothing flameworthy in what you have said or what you are going through or how you feel about any of it.In fact, I think these two sentences say what the real problem is:I think it goes without saying that there is something very, very wrong with a society that can't allow for a working family to make ends meet. There has to be a

ewe are herehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13339650361453626546noreply@blogger.com