Sunday, October 15, 2006

What's in a dream?

Posted by Anonymous.

If you'd like to use this space to tell stories/secrets/confessions of your dangerous maternal mind, anonymously or otherwise, send me an e-mail and you too can enjoy the refuge of the Basement.


I know that you're not supposed to write posts about your dreams, but I hope that exceptions to this rule can be made in the Basement.

I've been having dream about men other than my husband. Not sex dreams so much, though sex is sometimes involved, but dreams about being in love with other men. Not men that I know. Men that are, or seem to be, figments of my imagination. Usually I'm much younger than I am now. Sometimes I'm aware, in the dream, that I have a husband somewhere. Sometimes the dreams end badly, where I end up losing the person, getting hurt, that kind of thing. But the basic theme is always the same - meet some guy, realize that I am in love with that guy, fumble around about being in love, often have that love end badly, wake up.

I love my husband very, very much. We have a good sex life. I don't fantasize about other men, I can't imagine thinking about running off. So the dreams are weird, and they feel weird. I can't figure them out. I don't know why I have them.

It's not every night. But it's a few times a month, anyway.

I can understand about sex dreams. But love? Why love? I have love, lots of it, so why do I dream about finding it somewhere else?

Any dream analysts out there?


Kate said...

Dreams are quite interesting to analyze. My blog is devouted to researching and writing about certain dreams. You should check out my blog...there are several links to dream dictionaries online and such. Best of luck...your specific experience may also be related to wish fufillment.

Anonymous said...

I can sympathize because I have had similar dreams. I always feel guilty when I wake up, even though I never have any similar feelings when I am actually awake.

krista said...

Maybe they are about you loving different aspects of your husband? Like, all the different components of who he is?

Or maybe not... I don't know, I just don't want you feeling guilty about the dreams.

Jaelithe said...

I occasionally dream that I am married to one of my ex-boyfriends instead of my husband (not always the same ex-- just random ones, even a couple I was only dating for a really short time), or to completely made up dream men. Like your dreams, mine are not at all sexual in nature-- they are just about being in a love relationship with someone else. These dreams are almost always filled with a vague sense of sadness; in the dream I feel like something is not right, but I can't figure out what it is.

I think some dreams are a way of working out the "What if I had done XYZ instead?" thoughts we all have about our lives. Just your brain affirming you made the right choice.

Anonymous said...

I don't believe in dream analysis. I don't have a problem with people who do; I just don't. I believe that dreams are simply random firings of neurons mixed with snippets of what's happened in one's life. Sometimes the brain works through something that has happened recently or not so recently. I say don't make too much of it. But that's just me.

Anonymous said...

Anon - I actually find that kind of reassuring.

No Advice here... said...

I have the same dreams... it's so weird. And they leave me feeling guilty too. I never think these things in my waking hours.