Posted by Anonymous.
Friendship with a cousin just bounced right into the street and got squashed by a car.
How great is it to reconnect with people from long ago? Since moving back to home, I've had a lot of this going on. It's amazing how ten years away lets you change and you even find friendships where you didn't expect them.
But sometimes you put in the effort to reconnect, and after a while it's becoming quite evident that while you're all having a good time, you're the one putting in the effort? Months go by and you're still the one initiating the exact phrase, "Hey, I want to get together and see you." You see them be active with others, yet never a word to you.
I've had a few of these in my life. One told me she couldn't be around me because I was getting married and she was getting divorced, it hurt her too much. One of them told me my expectations were too high (she missed 2 playdates and didn't return any calls for over a week). Returning phone calls was too much for me to expect. Another told me it was my responsibility.
I'm familiar with the sign to give up. I know when to cool it. I mourn it. I dream about it. I dream about "high expectations" girl. I also know that sometimes they bounce back and in one instance, stronger than ever.
In fact, recently I got a message on my Voice Mail from one of these old friends, "why don't you come over?" I called back and left a message, "sounds great!" (thinking: It's Bouncin' Back!) And the response back is, "Oh sorry, someone just called and we'll be going with them now."
I know I'm weird... but am I rank? I know I'm more cynical now, but I thought that made me funnier. I've got cute kids you might like. I finally decided if it looks like you're being blown off and it smells like you're being blown off, chances are, you're being blown off. I finally realized that she just doesn't like me... and usually I'd just get over it, but I it's not just any friend... it's family. Yep... a cousin who I grew up with like a sister. She's told me it's my responsibility and goes out of her way to make dates with friends on facebook, but not with me and we even had a talk about how we re-establish things and she has done NOTHING... except the story above about inviting me and then dis-inviting me.
Thanks for the vent.. I was about to post this on mine and a friend advised against it.