Monday, January 05, 2009

Addict

Posted by Anonymous.

OK so I know my problem..I am an internet addict..
there. I said it.
do I forgo food?
no
do I forgo feeding my family?
no.
is my house hazmat bad?
no..
BUT
my house is NOT clean...it is cluttered and dusty and the clothes need washed and the floors need scrubbed..
I do delay feeding said family..sometimes the pull of the computer chair is just too great.
and sometimes I forgo feeding myself for a while..maybe not such a bad thing since i am over weight to begin with

my kids do suffer for it.
my husband suffers for it
their homework suffers for it.
my bills suffer for it.
the laundry suffers for it.
dinner suffers for it.
I know my health suffers for it.

am I addicted to porn?
No.
am I addicted to one thing?
no..
I LOVE being online..it is like a GIGANTIC book...anything you want to know/read/do all in one place.
I could clean..but there is some app on my space I can play instead..
I could get dinner now instead of rushing to throw it together at the last minute..BUTTT there is a message board somewhere that I HAVE to read now.
Oh the oldest child is suffering in school?
mmm..nope..sorry..have e-mail to answer.

for all of the sugar coating in the world.. nothing will change that I put this computer above my family.

sad.
very very very sad.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Me too!!


It's a great escape. I find myself drifting to the computer to numb my mind and escape my life (namely, my children). Better than drugs.

Not good. But we're so not alone!

Anonymous said...

This is me too! It got so bad that my husband and I had to make an agreement to not get the computers out after the baby has gone to bed. Otherwise we would spend our entire evening sitting across from each other with our laptops out...not talking. That was not healthy for our relationship. It has been hard but it has been worth it.

Anonymous said...

Oh, good. Someone else admitted it first! I hear you, loud and clear!! If you come up with a cutting back solution, please let us know!

NGS said...

Turn the computer off? Just a suggestion...

I mean, our computers get turned off at 6:00 pm and can't be booted up again until the next morning. It's an unspoken agreement that we have that allows us time together. Maybe tell your husband about it, so you have some encouragement to keep you faithful to your turn-off deadline? That gives plenty of time for dinner and homework and cuddling on the couch.

It probably won't help with the weight or the cleaning, but maybe you could clean in the evenings, too.

Vanessa said...

Hey, admitting that its a problem is the first step to correcting it. Try giving yourself a computer nanny. Get a program, if you have to. My dad did it when I was a kid. We each had our own log in and it was limited to a certain amount of hours per day, and could only be extended if we could justify that it was work.

Trying a checks and balances system like that with your husband is my suggestion. Discipline is so much easier when there's someone other than yourself to answer to, I find.

Good luck beating the e-demon.

Jess said...

I feel your pain....and I too feel pathetic about it at times.
I cannot tell you how many times I've gotten online to check one thing and get sucked in for 3+ hours.
I think of all the wasted time sitting on my fat ass doing nothing while life happens all around me with everyone else....Or maybe everyone else is on here, too?

Anonymous said...

yup- I have that too.

My therapist started to make the "escaping from everything else" connection once.

So I fired her.

(Kidding)

I heard my kids ask Dad for something once and he asked where Mommy was. My two year old, without missing a beat, (and not having prior immediate knowledge of my whereabouts) said "on the 'puter". It made me sad. That that is what their memories of me will be...

I try to do better. But it is a real addiction!

Anonymous said...

and here i was thinking i was the only one! Thanks for sharing maybe we all should start a support group online so we can yell at each other and say "get off the DAMN COMPUTER!!!!"

Jeni said...

Yeah, me, too. I've started keeping my laptop in a less comfy place - sitting at the dining room table isn't as comfortable as the couch, so I don't stay on for endless hours.

Expat Mom said...

Ack, this is very true for me. The sad part is that I work online, so it`s really, really tempting to just stay on and say it`s for work. sigh.

My goal this year is to start scheduling my working time and working in a cafe so I can actually focus on what I`m doing. That way, I`ll get more done in less time and be able to spend more time cleaning the house. Or something. Not involving the computer.

Anonymous said...

Snap. I'm doing a degree online too so I *have* to be online for hours on end. I end up doing 1 hour of crap for every hour of work!

witchypoo said...

My workspace is at the desktop, and my play space is a few steps away, in a comfy chair on the laptop. The laptop has a slower connection, so I basically do my blogging from it. Working online has gotten me more of a handle on the whole internet thing.
And made me a bit slacker with my blog.
The house still has enormous dust bunnies though.

Anonymous said...

Me too but the addiction could be a lot worse than information. Hmmm, I'm justifying my addiction lol.

Anonymous said...

I get sucked in too. I think of something random, and I just *have* to look it up!

A true addiction is not as easy to walk away from as just turning it off. If it were that easy, no one would ever get addicted to anything. I don't know what the solution is, but you are not alone.