Posted By Anonymous.
So, I was not at work for a day recently and the guy who subbed for me used my computer. He logged into gmail and didn't log out. I read his email. It was not my finest moment... but I did it.
It became obvious that he was "seeing" several women, including his long-distance girlfriend who is 6 months pregnant. (He commented that he liked the picture that she had attached to her last message because her t*tties looked so much bigger). There were messages from the local women, flirting, sex talk, etc.I wanted to send this long distance girlfriend forwarded messages of what he had sent/received from the other women, but I didn't. I logged him off, instead. I felt a bit guilty for reading his email. Now, two weeks later, I feel guilty that I didn't let the pregnant girlfriend know what was going on.
What do you think? What would you do?
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15 comments:
I can't see a post here, I read the teaser on Google reader but then *poof* nothing.
Please don't tell the pregnant woman anything at this point. she is fragile now and lonely.
She will find out some time down the road, when she is not so fragile.
Yeah, I think that guy's karma is going to catch up with him...
Hopefully he will get what's coming to him - he should get a reality check because anything in an email should be anything put on a postcard (for this exact reason). It was the right call NOT to send them to her - it will probably catch up with him but OMG, I'd have a hard time shaking this one too.
And sadly.. that guilt and conundrum is a big "lesson learned" on not reading other people's email. I know.. what's done is done. But now you are burdened with the consequences of his issues too.
It is not your place to do anything, but perhaps to suggest to him to make sure he signs out of his email next time he uses someone else's computer
I would want to know if I were the girlfriend. The sooner the better and frankly, I wouldn't care if it were anonymously. My friend's partner cheated on her for over 8 years before she found out. Unfortunately, that was 1 more kid later.
Ugh. That's a tough one. You should not have read the guy's email. (Although that's easy to say. I might have done the same,)
I would not tell the pregnant woman. Can you imagine? Six months pregnant?
That poor woman.
Yuck. What a crappy situation.
I wouldn't tell the girlfriend, only because it's totally out of your sphere of influence. If she was a friend of yours, or even if he was, that might be different, but it sounds like this guy is basically a stranger to you. Can't fix everything, and shouldn't always try.
But still. I totally understand why it would drag at you. I'd struggle, too. Yuck.
You should have told the girlfriend. I doubt since she is pregnant that they are having protected sex, and this idiot could be exposing her (and the baby) to STD's. I would want to know if it was me.
I don't know if I'd have the guts to do it at the time, but I think that it would be a good thing if his exploits had been 'accidently' forwarded to her -- as if he mis-typed or something.
I've been abandoned 6 mos into a pregnancy -- it was truly the worst time of my life, but in hindsight I'd MUCH rather have ditched his ass *then* as opposed to later. Better the memories of pregnancy be 'ruined' then to look back at the birth of your child and feel like you were some stupid loser who let some guy scam you. To think that you were in labor and he was looking into your eyes and whispering a bunch of fake bullshit?!? No, no, no -- I'd much prefer to go it alone.
Ofcourse, I would have a hard time dating a guy so crass as to say things about my 't*tties' in a picture, anyway. (I dated my own special type of as*hole). Shudder. Guys who use the word 't*tties' in any serious manner do not deserve to get laid, IMHO.
I would want to know if I was the pregnant woman, too. That said, I don't think it would have been the right thing to do to tell her. Vigilante justice like this doesn't, in my opinion, ever contribute to a society's well-being.
I would've read the email-don't feel too ashamed about that. I think the girlfriend needs to know. If there is a way to do it anonymously, that is what I would do.
You can't say anything, despite the weight you carry. I trust that she;ll be delivered the news as she needs to hear it and as she is able to take it.
I like the idea of letting him know he should sign out of his email in the future.
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